In order to remove the default row expansion icon and enable clicking the row itself to expand/collapse row details I have to do the following hack:

dataBound: function() {
                    $grid.find(".k-hierarchy-cell, .k-hierarchy-col").hide(); //get rid of detail icon
                    $grid.on("click", "tr", function(e) {
                        var $target = $(e.target);
                        if (!$target.hasClass(chkBoxClass) && !$target.hasAttribute("href"))    // ignore clicks on row select checkbox & links
                        {
                            var $this = $(this);
                            $this.find("td.k-hierarchy-cell .k-icon").click();
                            $this.next().find(".k-hierarchy-cell").hide();  //fix detail row spacing due to missing icon
                        }
                    });
                }

As you can see, I need a supported way to be able to change the detail expansion behavior from using the default triangle icon. It would also be great to have using checkboxes to select rows built-in.